My 3-year-old asked the all-too-familiar question, “Mama, can I watch something?” This question drives me crazy, especially on a beautiful day. “Bud, let’s keep playing outside!” (To which his response was “but when can I watch something?”) Ugh.
My child loves his TV. The funny thing is he doesn’t get a lot of it, but man, he loves his shows.
That love has this kindergarten teacher mama concerned.
I’ll never forget one of the years I was teaching kindergarten, I had a little boy who struggled. He didn’t just struggle with academics, but with every aspect of kindergarten.
The negative effects of technology on children’s brains
Children who spend a lot of their time on screens are scoring behind their peers in every area.
Research has shown us children who have too much screen time struggle with:
- Making friends and engaging with their peers- They aren’t exposed to holding conversations or relating to others when they are focused on a screen
- Any fine-motor related tasks- Children aren’t able to get the practice they need using their fingers when they are staring at a screen, pressing buttons, or swiping on screens
- Focus- Their brains are constantly being fed with flashing colors and shots of dopamine when they get answers correct and the game tells them “good job.” They haven’t had a chance to practice focusing.
- Pronouncing words correctly- Children don’t have enough practice speaking.
There is even research that shows too much screen time contributes to ADHD, Anxiety, Depression, and Obesity.
Check out these brain scans of preschoolers that were read to vs. preschoolers who spent a lot of time on screens. The children who have spent a lot of time staring at a screen have underdeveloped brains.
It’s Hard…
Screen time is one of those “sanity savers” for parents. Anytime we need a minute, it is an easy way to keep children occupied so we can get something done, or just simply have a minute to ourselves.
I’m guilty of it, too. I’m tired, busy, and sometimes just need a quiet minute. If we aren’t careful, we don’t realize how much screen time our children are actually getting. Small ways screen time adds up without us noticing:
- Watching a show or playing a game at a restaurant. Even babies will benefit from being able to watch and listen to conversations happening at the table.
- Screens in the car. Keep a stack of books in the car for them to look at, play a story or podcast, or have them look out the window and ask them to describe what they see.
- When they inevitably are bored. Help them learn to occupy themselves. Let them build their creative, innovative side, and be more active.
- Kids don’t need to be on learning apps. At all. Although short-term you may think learning apps are helping, they may actually do more harm than good.
Remember: children learn best through movement and play.
Research is showing too much screen time can actually be harmful, and that’s why I’m so passionate about it. I want children to have experiences to help their brains grow in healthy ways, and set them up for success in the long run.
Healthy Limits for Screen Time
If your child has spent a lot of time on screens, a new routine may be difficult. I promise it will be worth it though and you’ll notice.
Tell your child that your TV/Phone has to rest. Cover your TV with a blanket if you have to. Introduce them to board games, books, and other ways to play around your house.
You’ll have to play with them for the first few days. (Model how you want them to play when you are busy. Are they allowed to get the craft stuff out? What do they do with toys when they are finished?)
Another challenge: It’s also important for us to model healthy limits on screen time. I had to take some apps off my phone to do this because I would find myself getting on it every time I was not engaged with my children. I don’t want them to think being on my phone all the time is healthy. I also don’t want my children to feel like they have to compete for my attention with screens.
Then How Much Screen Time is OK?
The American Association of Pediatrics recommends no more than 2 hours a day for children older than 2, and no screen time for children under 2. (This does not include facetime with family).
A lot of people think that exposing their child to early learning by having their baby watch learning shows will benefit the baby, but according to research, TV and learning apps are not good for developing brains.
Your child will be much better off observing how you act and talk, exploring the world around them, and being active.
Through more physical activities, your child will learn perseverance, curiosity, problem-solving, empathy, courage to try new things, and natural academics. Children will naturally want to count, want to know what letters they are seeing and what they say, cause and effect, and so much more. Not to mention fine motor skills, gross motor skills, confidence, and imagination!
What’s on the screen matters, too!
Time limits aren’t the only important thing to think about. What they are watching is important, too.
We are very careful what (and how much) we allow our children to watch. Up until recently, it was all Sesame Street and Daniel Tiger.
Have you seen Daniel Tiger? There is a lesson with every show. Daniel Tiger has helped us through separation anxiety, trying new foods, our kitty’s death, and when we brought a baby home, just to name a few.
There are constantly ping pong balls flying through my house, bouncing off pots and pans, and strange little “trick shots” attempting to be made.
It’s always crazy but I know my child is learning creativity, problem-solving, and perseverance…not to mention how to occupy himself for hours! Although I get a little tired of trying to avoid being hit with a ping-pong ball, I love watching him try to figure out how to make the trick-shot he is attempting, and learning perseverance and creativity.
Will raising screen-free children put them behind?
When I first tell someone my dislike for technology, the typical response I get is “Don’t they use technology in school? Won’t they be behind?” Yes they do, and no they won’t.
I’ve had children from Amish backgrounds in my classroom who’ve never seen a screen and they pick it up quickly. They are right on track with the other students in my class (and most of the time, even above their peers because they have the skills of effort and perseverance).
Limits on screen time = HUGE benefits!
Because of our strict limits, your child is learning those important skills of perseverance, exploration, effort, curiosity, creativity, problem-solving that will last their lifetime.
They’re also developing fine and gross motor skills, spatial awareness, coordination, and academic skills of counting, numbers, letters, sounds, and so much more.
Like with everything, technology is fine in moderation.
Once your child is used to their limits and has practice playing by himself/herself, it will just be how things are and they won’t even bat an eye at finding something to play.
When I was teaching my child how to play by himself, I set a timer. I started at 15 minutes and told him I had some work to do but when the timer went off we would play.
This worked wonders. Just knowing there was a time limit helped him be successful. He was great as long as he knew there was a limit on the time I expected him to play on his own, and then we would get to play.
What do we do with all the screen-free time?
Some of our favorite things to do instead of screen time:
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- Board games (Here’s a list of our favorites)
- Play-doh
- Kinetic Sand (this can be a much easier clean up)
- Use creative toys such as magnitiles, bristle blocks, legos, or duplos
- Sensory Bins
- Build a marble run or use toilet paper tubes to build one on your door/wall.
- Color/draw (We are loving this book of mazes right now!)
- Do science experiments (The Dad Lab is a great resource for this)
- Go outside: (Follow their lead: Ask your child what they want to do)
- Let them be creative.
If you’d like more ideas, you may be interested in:
Babies:
The Most Important Thing to Do For Your Baby Starting Today
Best Baby Toys for Educational Play and Boosting Development
Toddlers:
Best Toys to Keep Your Toddlers Entertained and Learning
Preschoolers:
Most Meaningful {Skill Building} Gifts Your Preschooler will Love
Kindergarteners:
Best Books for Kindergarteners
Best Educational Toys for Your Kindergartener
The more your child practices occupying themselves, the better they will be at it. They’ll see a cardboard box and want to make it into a boat, airplane, train, or monster.
You’ve got this! Whether you are continuing to set strict limits on your child’s screen time or beginning to scale back, you are giving them the tools they need to be successful!
Want More?
If you liked this, you’ll love:
Why Minimalism is Important for Kids
Fostering Independence in Your Children
63 Fun Outdoor Activities for Kids and Families
30 Genius Role-Play Ideas that Boost Your Child’s Imagination
Your Turn
How do you put healthy boundaries on screen time?